It turns out procrastination is not typically a function of laziness, apathy or work ethic as it is often regarded to be. It’s a neurotic self-defense behavior that develops to protect a person’s sense of self-worth.
You see, procrastinators tend to be people who have, for whatever reason, developed to perceive an unusually strong association between their performance and their value as a person. This makes failure or criticism disproportionately painful, which leads naturally to hesitancy when it comes to the prospect of doing anything that reflects their ability — which is pretty much everything.
But in real life, you can’t avoid doing things. We have to earn a living, do our taxes, have difficult conversations sometimes. Human life requires confronting uncertainty and risk, so pressure mounts. Procrastination gives a person a temporary hit of relief from this pressure of “having to do” things, which is a self-rewarding behavior. So it continues and becomes the normal way to respond to these pressures.
Particularly prone to serious procrastination problems are children who grew up with unusually high expectations placed on them. Their older siblings may have been high achievers, leaving big shoes to fill, or their parents may have had neurotic and inhuman expectations of their own, or else they exhibited exceptional talents early on, and thereafter “average” performances were met with concern and suspicion from parents and teachers."
The first two paragraphs are my entire life.
And I still haven’t finished my application for grad school btw.
Welcome to life after Exeter.
Oh dear. Oh fucking dear. This explains so fucking much(via searchingforknowledge)
This legit describes everything perfectly. I spent over 12 hours at the library pulling an all nighter. And it was only during the last 2 hours that I was there that I actually accomplished any work. So much anxiety man.
unfortunately being gay in real life is not as fun as it is on the internet
SO false! I love being gay. Maybe it’s just my city.. but it’s just as fun if not more! The hot gay boys are even better in person ;)
I went out partying with the guy I was seeing this summer. We’ve been chilling more recently. It’s been weird but cool being friends. He’s a good guy.
Tonight I saw him get picked up and have this random party boy make out with him in my face. And he’s taking him home with him.
It was a growing experience for me.
Glad it happened. Still didn’t feel great.
Valerie, “V for Vendetta” (via embracewithme)
this is so powerful
M.Scott Peck, M.D. “The Road Less Traveled - A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth’” (via pointednorth)
and then it didn’t.
What a rough afternoon. But we spent the rest of the day together, and we’re gonna try and make it work. He’s so sweet but so messed up. I’m not gonna talk much about him anymore, but thought i’d let y’all know how my day was.